Slate’s sex advice column offers guidance on various topics related to intimacy and relationships. One reader, “Getting Bent,” recently started casual online dating after leaving an abusive marriage and is concerned about ensuring her sexual partners communicate their comfort levels.
Dear Getting Bent,
Talk to your partner about the importance of open communication during sex. Explain that you need to feel comfortable knowing they’ll let you know if they’re uncomfortable. Ask them if they feel like they can do this, and investigate any barriers they might face.
Don’t focus solely on physical intimacy; consider other aspects of a relationship. Be aware of your partner’s body language, facial expressions, and vocal cues during sex. Pay attention to signs of pleasure or discomfort, and trust that you’ll both be comfortable if you communicate openly.
If you decide to end the relationship, remember that you can’t control how the other person reacts. Keep things casual, as initially agreed upon, to avoid any misunderstandings.
Another reader, “Hookup Hungup,” is struggling to find opportunities for casual sex and intimacy in college due to a lack of dating culture and personal shyness. Jessica’s advice suggests joining clubs, meeting friends, and trying different social settings to increase chances of meeting new people and potentially forming connections.
For “Not All Fun and Games,” a couple with a long-term sex life has started using condoms on their large dildos to prevent infections but is experiencing recurring yeast infections despite proper cleaning. Jessica advises the couple to visit their gynecologist, explaining the situation, and discussing potential underlying causes of the recurring issues.
Lastly, “Sexually Single” seeks advice after meeting a great guy who reignites her interest in sex. However, as a 50-year-old woman who has never had sex since her early twenties due to her past commitments and faith, she’s unsure how to navigate this new connection while balancing her personal values and desires.
These cases highlight the importance of open communication, being aware of one’s own boundaries, and exploring different social settings to increase chances of meeting new people. By following these tips, individuals can better navigate their intimate lives and make informed decisions about their relationships and desires.
Source: https://slate.com/advice/2025/08/sex-advice-date-penis-appearance.html